Literal magic

On my way home from Texas last Monday, I sat behind two women on the flight from Houston to Chicago. They were discussing football, which was a common topic that morning. Their conversation centered around the Chicago Bears. "Now, I like this team," said the woman directly in front of me, who had been volubly stating her views in the comfortable manner of someone secure in the belief that she is absolutely correct. "They're skilled enough. But the 1985 Bears were literally magical."

Literally magical. Literally! This was the most delightful thing I'd heard all morning. I spent the next five minutes or so ignoring the safety demonstration, imagining that she had been correct. Walter Payton secretly casting spells on opposing players, William Perry bewitching actual refrigerators, Jim McMahon's enchanted arm, Mike Ditka as a sort of shadowy Dumbledore-like figure. But then I remembered the Super Bowl Shuffle.

West Texas ... snowflakes?

And ice pellets, and sleet, and freezing raindrops, if the weather reports are accurate. So, I'm headed to Texas this weekend. Guess what it's supposed to do in El Paso and Midland on Saturday and probably Sunday night and Monday? SNOW! I honestly didn't know it did that in West Texas. I thought maybe I just didn't know what I was talking about, but I checked online and the El Paso tourism site says that winter average temps are 55-60, and the city only gets something like 8 inches of rain per year. So how do we wind up with sleet and snow and a bunch of driving to do? I don't know. I do know that I'm prepared to have an utterly miserable weekend. But hopefully the kind of miserable that just becomes really hilarious at some point. I figure I'll expect the worst (I'm having visions of canceled flights, for example) because that way if it doesn't suck, I'll be pleasantly surprised. And if it does, well, I ... win because I predicted it? Hmm. Well, at any rate, barring the whole canceled flight scenario, I'll be hanging out with friends. Actually, no matter what, I should be seeing Paul in Chicago. Wish me luck!

There'll even be a band

Last time I saw Andrew Bird, I determined that the perfect setting for his show was the Orpheum Stage Door theater. I may now have to call it a tie, because Andrew Bird at the Hideout is pretty great too.

Saturday night's show had sold out in minutes, which was no great surprise - the Hideout is a tiny space, right on Andrew's home turf (Tim Tuten introduced him as Illinois's State Bird) - and in fact, his next show in Chicago after the new album comes out in March will be at the Riviera. Quite a difference. Despite the size and sold-out status of this show, the Chinook Lounge (hee hee) didn't really start to fill up until halfway through the Paulina Hollers' opening set. Come to think of it, that's another reason why I love the Hideout.

The Paulina Hollers themselves were quite enjoyable. I don't think their music has a particularly specific Celtic bent, but it nevertheless reminded me a performance we saw at a small pub in Glenbeigh when I was in Ireland. Must be all the fiddling. Although "Lost Girl" wasn't the Tilly and the Wall cover I'd secretly hoped for (I'd pay extra to see Jim Becker tap out some percussion), they wound up with a really nice rendition of the Dock Boggs classic "Sugar Baby." For some reason it seemed vaguely familiar.

Andrew warned us of a "marathon" set early in the show, and he was telling the truth. He played for about two hours, which was unexpected. By me, anyway. Accompanying him were Martin Dosh on drums, and Jeremy Ylvisaker on bass, guitar, and occasional backup vocals. The vast majority of the set was made up of new material - some songs I'd heard at previous shows, some I knew from the new Fingerlings disc, and some that were totally new to me. I like what I'm hearing, which makes me happy - I get the feeling the new album won't be as, well, different as the last couple have been; maybe not quite as adventurous - but I think it will still be good. I'm eager to hear the album versions of "Simple X" (a song Martin composed) and, if there is one, "Fiery Crash" - because both of them rocked quite hard in the live setting. Maker's Mark was being doled out courtesy of Katie, and the mood onstage and in the audience was pretty relaxed.

If I had to pick out some other highlights, I'd have to once again include "Why?" - Andrew is truly masterful at doing that one live. I think this was as close as I'd ever been to the stage for one of his performances, which made the subtle nuances all the more apparent and impressive. And of course, the smokin' closer of "Tables and Chairs." (In fact, I'm looking at Jay Ryan's lovely artwork for that very song on my wall right now.) Although he is "not one for singalongs," Andrew requested audience assistance with the violin melody toward the end of the song - he said he's been trying to get away from using any prerecorded tracks while playing "Tables and Chairs," so he'd need some help recreating that part vocally. We were only too happy to comply.

From the setlist:

Intro (TBD) [of course, I don't remember]
Nervous Tick
Measuring Cups
iMitosis
Why?
Sic of Elephants
Plasticities
Heretics
Armchairs
Dear Dirty
Simple X
Ravel
Cataracts [I think either this or Ravel wasn't played]
Scythians
Fiery Crash
Skin
Spare-ohs
Dark Matter
***
Glass Figurine
Tables & Chairs

Immediately following the show was the Hideout dance party. Sooz had to call it a night, but I was there with Sam for the better part of an hour. There was 90's party planning, a furry-hatted Tim jamming on congas by the bar, and some serious boogying with Thax. Also, if I had to coin a term to describe Andrew's dancing, I'd go with "gracefully spastic." All things considered, a worthy Saturday night at the Hideout.

Grandpa tales

I opened Blogger tonight intending to make a post, and then just wound up staring at the screen blankly for a few minutes. I wanted to write something, but I had nothing to write. Undaunted, I decided to write something anyway. So here is a story about my grandpa. I used to spend a lot of time over at my maternal grandparents' house when I was little. When my parents took a trip to Las Vegas when I was in kindergarten, my older sisters stayed at home but I stayed with Nana and Grandpa. One afternoon Grandpa and I were down the basement in his workshop - a place I loved dearly. I had grabbed a pencil and sheet of neatly cut paper from the supply at the table, because I wanted to draw my parents a welcome home cartoon. I decided that the cartoon would depict a mother yelling at her son because his dog had pooped on the living room carpet. I'm not quite sure why this was supposed to welcome my parents home from Vegas, but anyway. I drew the picture, and it came time for the cartoon speech bubbles. For this I needed Grandpa's assistance. I wanted no spelling errors. "Grandpa?" I asked. "How do you spell 'poop'?"

Grandpa didn't miss a beat. "S-H-I-T," he replied. Not being completely naive, I started giggling. Grandpa started laughing too. I think the cartoon ended up saying something like "The damn dog's shit on the carpet again!" and my mom thought it was hilarious. This tale from my formative years probably explains a lot, actually.

Yahoo ... video captions

Yahoo, consistent provider of entertaining news headlines, has come through again - this time with a video caption. It's attached to a story about a guy dressed as Tigger at Disney World hitting a kid, and reads:

Tigger, a Disney character known for his high jumps and ferocious speed, punched a boy from New Hampshire in the face.

Because it actually was Tigger who did that. Which is why it is vital that we understand he's known for "high jumps" and "ferocious speed". Personally, I would have added that he's both "bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy" and "fun fun fun fun fun".

Books of '06

Happy new year! Here's that list I promised - every book I read in 2006, in order. Only books that I read all the way through were counted. Some number crunching follows:

Toothpaste for Dinner - Drew
Name All the Animals - Alison Smith
Mommy Knows Worst - James Lileks
Come Back to Afghanistan - Said Hyder Akbar
The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier and Clay - Michael Chabon
The Cell - Stephen King
Created in Darkness by Troubled Americans - McSweeney's
All Souls - Michael Patrick MacDonald
Summer Sisters - Judy Blume
Wisconsin Capitol: Fascinating Facts - Diana Cook
Lost in Time - Hans Magnus Enzensberger
Nick of Time - Anne Lindbergh
Outcasts of 19 Schuyler Place - E.L. Konigsburg
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants - Ann Brashares
The Second Summer of the Pants - Ann Brashares
Girls in Pants - Ann Brashares
The Second Mrs. Gioconda - E.L. Konigsburg
A Child Called It - David Pelzer
Lost Boy - David Pelzer
Haroun and the Sea of Stories - Salman Rushdie
Heart of a Dog - Mikhail Bulgakov
We're All in This Together - Owen King
The Lake House - James Patterson
The Dante Club - Matthew Pearl
The Blood of Strangers - Frank Huyler
Somehow Form a Family - Tony Earley
Blue Highways - William Least Heat Moon
The Lost Continent - Bill Bryson
Anne of Avonlea - L.M. Montgomery
Anne of the Island - L.M. Montgomery
Anne of Windy Poplars - L.M. Montgomery
You Shall Know Our Velocity - Dave Eggers
Anne's House of Dreams - L.M. Montgomery
The Time Traveler's Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
A Walk in the Woods - Bill Bryson
The Memory Keeper's Daughter - Kim Edwards
The Shining - Stephen King
Island of the Blue Dolphins - Scott O'Dell
I'm a Stranger Here Myself - Bill Bryson
Eye Contact - Cammie McGovern
Kitchen Confidential - Anthony Bourdain
Daniel Isn't Talking - Marti Leimbach
Magical Thinking - Augusten Burroughs
The Poe Shadow - Matthew Pearl
In A Sunburned Country - Bill Bryson
Nightmare at 20,000 Feet - Richard Matheson
Jane of Lantern Hill - L.M. Montgomery
Stone Field, True Arrow - Kyoko Mori
Two-Part Invention - Madeleine L'Engle
Emily of New Moon - L.M. Montgomery
Emily Climbs - L.M. Montgomery
Emily's Quest - L.M. Montgomery
One Good Turn - Kate Atkinson
The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
The Amazing Mackerel Pudding Plan: Classic Diet Recipe Cards from the 1970s - Wendy McClure
The Tropic of Cancer - Henry Miller
The Nasty Bits - Anthony Bourdain
Burning Fence - Craig Lesley
The Summer We Got Saved - Pat Cunningham Devoto
Twins - Marcy Dermansky
The Year of Magical Thinking - Joan Didion
A House Like a Lotus - Madeleine L'Engle
You & You & You - Per Nilsson
Don't Try This at Home: Culinary Catastrophes from the World's Greatest Chefs - Various
Somebody's Daughter - Marie Myung-Ok Lee
The Language of Baklava - Diana Abu-Jaber
26a - Diana Evans
Samantha's Surprise - Maxine Rose Schur
Molly's Surprise - Valerie Tripp
The Best American Travel Writing 2004 - Various
Lisey's Story - Stephen King

Total books read: 71

Nonfiction books: 24 (34%)
Fiction books: 47 (66%)

By female authors: 35 (49%)
By male authors: 33 (46%)
By both: 3 (4%)

Marketed for children/teens: 21 (30%)

Read previously: 14 (20%)

You should definitely read: 26a by Diana Evans. I didn't not expect it to be good, but it took me completely by surprise. One of the best books I read in 2006, and one of the most unique.

You absolutely should not read: The Lake House by James Patterson. It was the first book I ever read by James Patterson, and based on this book, it will also be the last. I know he's a hugely popular writer, and I have no idea why. I'm not entirely convinced that he's not just a highly trained monkey.