Gregg Typing, Second Edition - 1958

It's another gem of an old book that I share with you today. This one didn't come from the parents' Basement o' Wonders, but the grandparents' Basement o' Wonders (Cellar o' Curiosities?) when we were cleaning it out last fall. It's a textbook from a 1958 typing class. I assume it belonged to one of my aunts - I'm not sure how many guys actually took typing back in 1958. This guy did, though:



Let's consider this fellow for a moment. First off - nice sweater, my friend. Secondly ... is he wearing Mary Janes? Further examination of his legs leads to three possible conclusions. 1) He is wearing pants and socks of the exact same color, and the pants are capri length. 2) He's wearing footie pajama pants with shoes over them. 3) He's not wearing any pants at all, and he has a pocket-shaped scar on his upper thigh. You make the call.

One of the funny things about the book (besides the photos of mammoth metal typewriters under the heading "Which of these typewriters will you be using?") is the fact that the troubleshooting sections include help for "striking the keys too lightly" and "striking the keys too hard" - because on an actual typewriter, that really did affect what went onto the page. Also, this is great - in the event that you didn't have a 1/! key, you were supposed to type a period, backspace, and then type an apostrophe on top in order to create an exclamation. Sweet Moses. (Side note - I know I'm acting like typewriters are these archaic cave machines only glimpsed in legend, but of course I did my first typing on a typewriter. I'm quite familiar with the quirks of the later models, but it's easy to forget how comparatively recent that was ... as I sit here blogging remotely.)

Here's a practice paragraph from Lesson 4:

Dear Jeff:   I guess I am all set for the
game.   I must get some ice cream for the
folks as I come home; that is all that I
must do.   Oh, I must get some cake, too.

The guide suggests spending 2 minutes on each line, which seemed ridiculous until I remembered that erasing backspace keys hadn't been invented yet. Shudder.

I'm beginning to notice a zen-like beauty and simplicity to the lesson-ending paragraph reviews. Here's another:

I can see all six men as they work over
a log pile.   One is using his axe; see,
he has just swung it way over his head.
They might quit soon:   It is half done.

Lesson 7 over, grasshopper. I wonder if I could have any success publishing a volume of typing haiku.

However, in Lesson 23, they let the big secret out of the bag:

It is now time to tell you that it is not through chance that the right margins are even in all the timed writings. Each line had to be revised many times, and it was quite a job. When you do other kinds of work, you must realize that you will not have straight right margins. Do not expect them.

WHAT?? You BASTARDS.

Other favorite sentences:

It seems Lee keeps bees in apple trees.
Jackie was quite vexed by this lazy power farming.
Pack my box with five dozen jugs of liquid veneer.
His need:  a tasty square meal.
Those big men will quickly jeopardize five exits.
Miriam might make more famous skimmers.

Skimmers? I'm thinking either an article of clothing or some sort of 1950's snack food. Any ideas?

Predictably, as the lessons progress, the paragraphs become more involved. Every so often, I'm planning to inject a poignant 1958 typing textbook vignette into the blog for a little light reading. Stay tuned!