Blender is funny

I recently had to use up my Midwest Airlines miles before they expired. Since the only miles I had resulted from one round-trip flight to Denver, the only things I could afford were five free magazine subscriptions from a rather meager list. One of those subscriptions was for Blender magazine, and my first issue arrived today.

I've read Blender before, but it's been awhile. It's a guilty pleasure - kind of trashy, but fun. It's the magazine equivalent of reality TV. Anyway, I thought I'd share some of Blender's year-end amusement with you.

For one thing, it's informative. I'm sure I could have learned much of the following information from other sources were I more celeb-savvy, but until tonight I didn't know that:

- Rivers Cuomo lived in an undergrad dorm at Harvard while finishing his literature degree. (Presumably, he is done now that the semester is over.)
- Snoop Dogg is coming out with a line of foot-long hotdogs in January called ... Snoop Doggs. Hee hee. Hee hee hee.
- Michael Tapper, from the band We Are Scientists, looks like a younger, healthier Shane McGowan
- The Arcade Fire played an impromptu 2:00 a.m. gig in November at Union Square Park in NYC, just for fun
- Phil Spector now has "less hair, exactly the same amount of crazy"
-Giant Drag has a song called "YFLMD" (a.k.a. "You Fuck Like My Dad")
-U2's rider includes toothpicks

Quotes that made me giggle:

"Musically, I don't think we could be in a better place right now."
-Fred Durst, re: Limpbizkit

"I want to go to Egypt and Japan and open orphanages. A chain of them."
-Lindsay Lohan

Best End-of-Year Q&A Responses:

Man-crush of the year
The Korean guy, Jin, from Lost - he has the most striking features I've seen in a long time. His cheekbones are phenomenal.
-Ben Gibbard

Band you'd most like to see replace their singer on a reality show
It should be someone whose name is actually the band. Like the Dave Matthews Band - it's the next logical extreme.
-Ben Gibbard

Saddest celebrity breakup
You have to feel for Jennifer Aniston - isn't that every woman's nightmare? To know your man is fucking the hottest woman in Hollywood? But I really thought Paris and Paris were going to last and that her days of being a stupid whore were over.
-Carl Newman

Favorite sign of the apocalypse
Didn't all the turnpikes recently convert to EZ-Pass? That's my favorite sign - it's like, if you don't have the mark, you will not pass.
-Carl Newman

Obsession of the year
Coffee and chocolate and cake. I used to eat vegetables and stuff. But, in the last year, I've just thought, fuck it.
-Eddie Argos

Favorite sign of the apocalypse
My friend Dickie believes in all that. Apparently Mars is doing stuff. To be honest, I'm too busy eating cake to pay attention.
-Eddie Argos